I was mean and unfair to my husband in the last post. I called his questions dumb. They weren't exactly.... dumb. They were.... uninformed. Anything financial FREAKS HIM OUT and he tends to take on a challenging tone of voice and get that strange darting look in his eyes. He also gets very defensive because he doesn't make much money and most of our bills are his expenses so he feels very guilty.
He's a very smart man so the whole denial of any understanding of anything financial makes me laugh. When I say things like, "Wow, I was looking at the credit card statement and we spent a lot last month on gas." He will respond with, "Oh, ok, I'll pay cash for some of my gas this month." Um, because why? So I can't track our spending at all? Because, honey, it all comes outta the same pot.
I admit to pushing his buttons. I check our bank statements on-line from work several times a week (gotta get the info there since he isn't writing it in any bank book) and I like to call him up around 1:15 in the afternoon and say, "So, what did you have for lunch at Bob's today?" I also torture him because my moderately-conservative IRA fund is doing better than his very-conservative IRA fund.
My financial philosophy is simple. Make it easy for yourself and save in little bits wherever you can.... for example, student loans. The rate is high. 8%. So I found out they'd drop it .25% if we switched to electronic payment. So, we save .25% plus 39 cents and an envelope every month, plus the cost of buying new checks sooner (and you know I have to get Hot Stuff those pricey duplicate ones AND I splurge and get him the cutesy ones from the Rocky Mountain Elk Foundation.... I use the plain-Jane cheapos even though we share an account), we never have to worry about late fees and with eft you can vary the amount you pay in any given month if you want to pay extra. So Hot Stuff was ok with that switch.... he was even ok with me upping the amount we pay every month is a desparate attempt to pay something beyond just interest. (I swear the total loan NEVER goes down.) The real beauty of eft is I can sneak in extra money whenever I can and he doesn't know about it. How terrible is that?
Hot Stuff believes in having all of your money where you can get at it. If it was up to him nothing would ever get invested and we would make tiny payments on everything over long periods of time. I like to pay cash. Wait, no, I like to put it on the credit card and get airline miles for it and then pay off the card. The compromise we made was this.... He let me get a financial advisor and put a pile (oh, it was a small pile) of money into a money market. Pretty conservative stuff and we have an actually checkbook if we need to get at it. Then I set it up so once it reaches a certain amount they take anything over that amount and put it into longer term and less liquid accounts. I also set up a lovely little college fund for the children. And where was I going with this? Oh, the compromise.... the compromise is, well, there isn't one. I ask his opinion and then do whatever the hell I want anyway.... there it is in black print.... I confess I am an elitist.
Money. Finances. Jobs. Careers. These are the things that are worrying me these days. I know the worries won't ever go away but I recently made a decision to get serious about getting a new career after we have the baby. Because the 5 year plan is looking pretty bleak. I can't afford to be a stay-at-home-mom and, the way things are right now, I can't even afford to cut back to part-time (my ideal). I've been here 7 years and I'm topped out, burned out & in need of new challenges. (And more money, of course....)
So I think. And I think. And I realize the thing I need to do is figure out what I want to DO. What could I do every day that would be interesting to me? Or at least not bore me to tears? And then I can't think of anything and I think I'm a boring person with no skills and talents and I have to go eat chocolate and get over it. Ya'll know the cycle.....
Um, ok. Enough whining. End of Post. Out.