Radio Silence

Can I admit to you that I feel like hell right now?

I had what we are calling a "missed miscarriage" this past month. Or maybe it was just a combination of weaning & lack of sleep & no more depo shots. Or maybe this is Just The Way My Body Works now.... oh lord, please no. If I have to deal with this for the rest of my life I recommend you all get stock in Playtex. What? TMI? (My brother is trying to shut off his monitor with his eyes covered right now.)

Emotionally it doesn't pack the punch like our "real" miscarriage did. For one thing... I don't even know that it WAS a pregnancy. And for another.... I get no freebies from this one... in the grand scope of things it doesn't GET me anything.... no concern about blood incompatibilities or not being able to carry a pregnancy.... the evidence I can deal with that is jumping on my couch right now.


So I'll comfort myself with a nice glass of wine and a heating pad for a few more days until the tides turn again.