Wednesday, July 07, 2010

Is it Wednesday?

I'm so restless right now.

I'm supposed to be in Colorado.

All week.

And I'm not.

And I'm resentful.

So I've been starting things and not finishing them.... an old bad habit that I fight on a regular basis... I've had it more in control the last few years but when things go bad it comes right back like an eating disorder or hoarding or something.

Is starting and not finishing a certifiable disorder? 

Add to this... my sister-in-law has been here the last few days.  So there is that added bit of stress... it isn't a huge stress or anything because generally she's easy to tolerate and I know she always means well. 

It's just another of my many inadequacies....    I'm a score keeper.  Her kids are involved in all the activities and excel at everything.  Her ten-year-old has a nicer ipod than I do.  Her seven-year-old has nicer clothes than I do.  Forget feeling bad for my kids... I feel bad for me!  It really does strike me how ridiculous I sound when I put it like that...

So to recap:
1.  I start things and don't finish them.
2.  I keep score and secretly deem myself inadequate because I never rank.

Obviously I lack self-discipline.

So I must regiment myself.

1.  Last night I made up kid beds and tidied their room, I set up my flowerbed sprinklers and I cleaned off the front porch.  Can I tell you there were a pair of male socks balled up on the porch (and they weren't from the child....)?  Also an empty cat litter pan and a pile of rocks.  I also stopped on my way home from work and bought treats for "movie" day today at daycare.  I grilled burgers and dogs and played on the hammock with the kids.
2.  This morning I finished cleaning the bathroom, did some laundry, picked up the living room, reconfigured the laundry room, cleaned the fridge and tidied the kitchen.
3.  Tonight I will re-reconfigure the laundry room because i don't like it and banish the new flimsy shelves I bought to the shed where they will help me organize.  Then I will rethink the dreaded laundry room corner.  Pictures soon.  I must also fold the laundry I did this morning and someday I HAVE to vacuum the living room.
4.  Things I have purchased that must be returned:  The shelf hanger thing for wine glasses (doesn't fit my cabinet), the cubbie cubes I bought at Lowe's (too expensive and not the right thing).
5.  Things I must buy:  shaving cream for Hot, kid claratin for Tuff (she's all runny nosed and itchy-eyed for some reason... so I will try claratin), 3 big boxes for the laundry room to store kid memory stuff in.
6.  Things I should clean but haven't:  the computer corner.... A solid 30 minutes of filing and cleaning would probably take care of it but I just haven't done it. 

Ugh.  This is like the third Monday this week.


Christal said...

Sorry to hear you're missing a visit with a friend. It's tough when stuff gets in the way of family/friend visits.

Try the generic brand claratin at Costco (my vet pointed out it's cheaper & the same stuff).

We had 2 memory things going when darling daughter was young. First, all the art/schoolwork type projects went on display (no pre-set time limit -- just whenever I felt like neatening up), then into a flat box. It kept it under control. We kept most of it & at 26 she still laughs at it (ran across it again when we packed to move.)

2nd, since we had so many hand-me-downs & hand-me-overs,she was allowed to keep (in a steamer type trunk) 1 outgrown outfit every month. Then at the end of the year, she'd weed out what wasn't really a favorite. So, what we've got left are things like a purple kuspuk (Alaskan jumper/coat with hood), carhartts coveralls with a painted horse, the long pepto bismo pink skirt with cowgirls etc printed on it along with the pink cap pistol(her Annie Oakley look). The 2 (too expensive) Jessica McClintock velvet dresses her uncle bought her over my objections. And so on. That way she didn't feel so bad about giving away the other stuff. My girlfriend & I have photos of all 5 of our girls in the same ruffly burgandy dress.

Elle said...

Oh My God. It's so good to know it's not just me and the start things, get distracted, start something else disorder isn't just me. It has crossed state lines. My theory is that you are my finisher. For five years, I've been stockpiling projects so that when we are together, I'll start it, you finish it and together, we will get shit done. See, in your absence, I've carried on and now, what a mess I've made!!

I'm making my fair share of returns. Buyer's remorse from my retail therapy has reared her ugly head.

Still thinking of you . . . . and imagining another way . . .