"Dude, don't fall on that thing."
"Get that thing out of your mouth if you are going to run."
"What is that thing?"
"Honey, does our son have a plastic crotch cream applicator in his mouth?"
What?* They make great tub toys. They come in packets of 7... one for each finger on one hand, one in the mouth and one, well, on any other projection-y body part you can think of.....
*It isn't like they were used. They are leftovers from the great butt-rash escapade of Oct 2005.