Hello. My name is Homestead. I have a confession to make.
I read "What to Expect When You are Expecting" and just last week I threw away the ground flax seed in the door of my fridge.... ya'll know what I'm talking about....
I also got rid of the candied ginger & gingerbeer I bought to ward off the morning sickness I never had.
Oh, and while I was pregnant I ate hot dogs, deli meat & even a can of tuna.
I drank decaf.... but sometimes I didn't... if you know what I mean.
I had half a glass of wine... more than once.
I got a flu shot during my first trimester.
I went on a cream-based diet during my pregnancy. Indeed, a trip to Charleston, SC was my undoing.... she-crab soup and cheesy grits every day.
I sat in hot tubs.
I never wore maternity underpanties.
I rode horses during my first trimester, skied & fly-fished during my second trimester and fought a wildfire during my third trimester.
And that's just the pregnancy... wait until I tell you all the things I've done to the poor kid since then!
6 comments:
I think I love you, Homestead.
I refused to wear the maternity underpants. REFUSED. It went against everything I believe in.
Love this. I'm surprised my kid didn't come out saying, "Yo quiero Taco Bell. If you know what I mean.
After living in Europe when #1 was a toddler, I partook in my share of the glasses of wine when pregnant with #2. She's actually *healthier* than he'll EVER be!
What the hell did our pioneer ancestors do when they were pregnant? I don't think life stopped and they all went on macrobiotic diets.
I'm with Susan! No maternity undies for me either. You drank decaf? Girl, I drank TWO CAFFINATED lattes a day. (I read those caffeine studies . . . they feed those rats the equivalent of 150 cups of coffee a day. Two lattes was not going to make a difference. Plus, how else was I supposed to get through a pregnancy while chasing around a one-year-old???
Oh, and I jogged until I was 5 months pregnant.
Oh, and I drank wine. Not a lot. But some.
What are maternity pants? Thank god I live in the UK - We are advised, oh yes, advised to drink a glass of wine a day while preggers!
Actually, in the five years I have spent either pregnant or breastfeeding (Oh lord, please let it end soon), healthy eating guidelines have changed constantly - 1st pregnancy = eat tuna, no alcohol, 2nd pregnancy = no tuna, occasional alcohol, 3rd pregnancy = some tuna, regular alcohol!
Maternity undergarments are just wrong on so many levels.... I'm pretty sure I need a visual aid.... imagine taking your big ole melon-belly and swathing it in yards of synthetic fabric and elastic... that's what most maternity panties look like. Myself, I didn't like the feel of anything touching my belly so that over-the-belly stuff was not for me.
I'm a simpleton so I was pretty happy with virgin margaritas. I drank lots of club soda with a lime in a rocks glass. Heck, I still drink a lot of that.... I'm one of those people that is more about the ritual than the actual alcohol I guess.
My doc told me the story about his patient who jogged to his office, in labor, and he gave her a ride to the hospital... that is not me.... I'm more of a yoga person.... and isn't yoga glorious when you are pregnant? So flexible.
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