A little lesson.....

There’s a moose in the neighborhood. All the more motivation to get a new battery to fix the camera. This is wwaaaaayyyyyy less scary to me than the bear that was in the neighborhood….. Why? I think, statistically, more people are harmed by moose than bears and moose are definitely bigger than bears…. this bear anyway. Bears just want to get into the garbage cans.

And there is a badger living at the curve down the road and badgers are mean. Really mean. Forget “Wind in the Willows” and all that….. badgers will eat your shit if given half a chance.

But I don’t mind badgers half as much as the stupid feral cat that sprayed all the pellet bags in the lean-to. Nasty. I woulda 5-pumped that cat with the bb gun if my husband would honor my wishes and get me a bb gun. 5-pumps…. that’d sting.

He won’t get me a bb gun because he’s afraid I’ll shoot at the deer to keep them out of the tulips. I won’t shoot the deer because the deer eat the leaves off the lawn and I like that and I’m transplanting all the tulips to one spot so I can net them and only gardening with “deer resistant” perennials in the rest of the yard.

I’m no redneck bb gun freak. I know you can only 3-pump and aim below the shoulders on a human target. I’ve never torn apart a vacuum cleaner bag to get out bb’s to shoot at the neighbor’s dog when it was chasing my horse. (Hhhmmmm…. I wonder who did that…. Does he, by chance, desire to drive a Travelall???)

Truth be told…. I have a soft spot for the deer…. There is a reason for the term “doe eyes” and I’ve seen it. They are like little kids. They give you that look and you just have to forgive them for turning the front flower bed into an all-you-can-eat buffet. I even forgive the big buck for beating the hell out of my evergreen when he was in rut last fall. It was a pretty funny sight once I figured out what all the ruckus was about. I wonder what he would do if I got one of those fancy juniper topiaries all trimmed up to look like a doe…. On second thought… I don’t want to think about it.

So, just to recap, there is a moose on the loose and I’m going to try to get some pictures.

And that is my Wildlife Lesson of the Day for you.