Friday, December 09, 2005

Well Fuck.

Sorry, had to drop the f-bomb in the title just to keep with the spirit of things....

I just found a post I wrote in mid-October and never posted..... so here it is..... kinda unfinished.... like so many things.....

Things I learned this weekend.

You can wrap a package beautifully and still not like the parents of the little girl you are giving the gift too.

The grey in my hair is paint…. Really.

You will feel better if you get new green apple dishwasher detergent & dish soap…. Then splurge and buy yourself a green apple candle and start referring to it as “spa kitchen.”

I end way too many sentences with prepositions. When did my grasp of the language become so poor? And why do I think myself justified in tacking “asshole” on the end of every sentence just to cover the preposition?

If you give a little boy a cup of water and a sponge brush he will “paint” an entire door clean. No guarantees on what you are setting yourself up for in the future when he gets his hands on a paint-loaded paintbrush.

Babies like McDonald’s. (First McD’s meal…. Write it in the baby book!)

When you touch up trim at knee level be prepared to discover a little boy with paint behind his ears.

The Dyson Rocks.

No matter how funny you might think it would be to paint a grey skunk stripe on the dog… don’t do it.

Getting up at 6:00 am sucks…. Especially on a weekend.

If you paint the garage door it will rain.

The older I get the less tolerance I have for modern country music.

5 comments:

Susan said...

Spa kitchen. I like that. Do I have to COOK in the spa kitchen, or can I just relax with a cup of tea?

Did you ACTUALLY paint the dog?

SierraBella said...

I love this post!

"You can wrap a present..." so true!

LadyBug said...

That's because modern country music isn't country...it's POP.

(Sorry. That's a sensitive subject for me. I miss the "old" country music...when it was still COUNTRY music. Sigh.)

Homestead said...

Susan- Hell no you don't have to COOK in the spa kitchen. I like to put the red kettle on and then stand over the steam for a true spa treatment. I might have painted a little tiny stripe on the dog... but he asked me to do it.

SB- I really like this little girl and I simply can't STAND her parents.

LadyBug- I think you are right.... I don't do very well with pop music.

Anonymous said...

ending a sentence with a preposition and "asshole"? As in, "What did you take your pants off for, asshole?"