My grandma & grandpa
Monday, May 30, 2005
My grandma
1. Peonies were her favorite flowers.
2. I had my own toothbrush & a drawer at her house for clothes… I stayed that often.
3. She loved to go, go, go…. Someplace exotic or to a basketball game… it didn’t matter.
4. She could sew anything… without a pattern.
5. She drove really fast…. She taught me to drive.
6. She could cook really well but her kitchen always looked like a tornado hit.
7. She liked “The Young & The Restless.”
8. She said things like, “Raining like a cow pissing on a flat rock.”
9. She HATED mice.
10. She taught me how to haul dinner to the field.
My grammy
1. She made the best waffles and said she didn’t trust anyone who ate just one waffle.
2. She had a pink refrigerator.
3. She preferred bright clothes and good jewelry.
4. She loved going to the casino… just for lunch, of course.
5. She took us swimming and she would swim with us and not just sit on the shore.
6. She went to Reno every year for her birthday.
7. She traveled all over the world with her little red suitcase.
8. She came to the US as a little girl and didn’t know the language.
9. She cooked her coffee in a percolator on the stove… a pink stove.
10. She tried to teach us the value of working hard & then playing hard.
2. She had a pink refrigerator.
3. She preferred bright clothes and good jewelry.
4. She loved going to the casino… just for lunch, of course.
5. She took us swimming and she would swim with us and not just sit on the shore.
6. She went to Reno every year for her birthday.
7. She traveled all over the world with her little red suitcase.
8. She came to the US as a little girl and didn’t know the language.
9. She cooked her coffee in a percolator on the stove… a pink stove.
10. She tried to teach us the value of working hard & then playing hard.
Sunday, May 29, 2005
Like you don’t already know the ending….
Freakin’ “Titanic” is on NBC tonight. I’ve never seen the entire movie…. Although I’ve had to endure portions of it. This is the problem with only getting NBC & PAX on the downstairs tv…. Yes, I could go upstairs & readjust the rabbit ears and take my chances with the offerings on ABC or CBS, but, really, what is the point?
Thursday, May 26, 2005
In which I don't refer to The Girls as Boobages... not even once.
Breasts.
They are odd.
I mean really.
To be perfectly honest, I haven't had the opportunity to view a whole lot of them (with the exception of showering after basketball games, I guess).... but the ones I have seen on real women never look like what I imagine ideal breasts look like. I don't know what I think ideal breasts look like under the clothes & special undergarments. There is a lot to be said for special undergarments.
So I was looking at breasts this morning. Specifically, before & after pictures of lifts & reductions (don't ask... it is a long story). I realize that I have no concept of cup size. I mean, how do they decide what a "b" cup is.... I looked at the pictures.... some were big and some were little. Where is the science? I want science.
I always think I am a "b" cup. Even now, when I pop the snaps on a "d" nursing bra and amply fill a "dd" and can even successfully wear the one black nursing bra I have... and it is an "e" cup. In my head, I'm sure I am a B.
I was wearing my "b" bras when I was almost 9 months pregnant and couldn't figure out why the pregnancy books were recommending I get new, bigger bras. My best friend came to visit from out-of-state and said, "Yeah, you're a B for bbbbb-barely in there." (The good news is once she knew I was large & in-charge she sent me a bunch of nursing bras. I believe her comment was, "I would have never believed YOU could be that large." I never would have believed she & I would wear the same bras... she has a gigantious rack!)
And nipples! I saw some of the oddest nipples this morning. Really. I am flummoxed. I had to stop and say a little “thank you” to the powers that be for giving me such cute nipples. I should call my mom and tell her thanks for the genetics. Having hideous nipples is something I didn’t even know I should be worried about.
I think I will go ask my husband what he thinks…. He’s always so insightful on topics like this. Then maybe I will post the story about the first time I wore a WonderBra… it is a good one, I promise.
They are odd.
I mean really.
To be perfectly honest, I haven't had the opportunity to view a whole lot of them (with the exception of showering after basketball games, I guess).... but the ones I have seen on real women never look like what I imagine ideal breasts look like. I don't know what I think ideal breasts look like under the clothes & special undergarments. There is a lot to be said for special undergarments.
So I was looking at breasts this morning. Specifically, before & after pictures of lifts & reductions (don't ask... it is a long story). I realize that I have no concept of cup size. I mean, how do they decide what a "b" cup is.... I looked at the pictures.... some were big and some were little. Where is the science? I want science.
I always think I am a "b" cup. Even now, when I pop the snaps on a "d" nursing bra and amply fill a "dd" and can even successfully wear the one black nursing bra I have... and it is an "e" cup. In my head, I'm sure I am a B.
I was wearing my "b" bras when I was almost 9 months pregnant and couldn't figure out why the pregnancy books were recommending I get new, bigger bras. My best friend came to visit from out-of-state and said, "Yeah, you're a B for bbbbb-barely in there." (The good news is once she knew I was large & in-charge she sent me a bunch of nursing bras. I believe her comment was, "I would have never believed YOU could be that large." I never would have believed she & I would wear the same bras... she has a gigantious rack!)
And nipples! I saw some of the oddest nipples this morning. Really. I am flummoxed. I had to stop and say a little “thank you” to the powers that be for giving me such cute nipples. I should call my mom and tell her thanks for the genetics. Having hideous nipples is something I didn’t even know I should be worried about.
I think I will go ask my husband what he thinks…. He’s always so insightful on topics like this. Then maybe I will post the story about the first time I wore a WonderBra… it is a good one, I promise.
Car Seats Today
Travel with children has changed. We all have memories of snoozing in the back window of the Pontiac on long family trips. One time my dad made a platform/pen in the back of the Grand Torino for a trip to Washington.
When we were a bit older, we had a baby blue, four-door, diesel Volkswagon Rabbit. It only had two seat belts in the back so dad took an old belt out of the Plymouth (it is still parked under our tree house at Grandpa’s) and installed it in the middle for my sister’s car seat. She was the dividing wall and my brother and I fought over her in the car seat all the way to Grammy’s house… it explains so much. Yes, people, that is correct. 3 children & 2 adults plus gear in a RABBIT for a NINE hour (plus construction & potty breaks) drive.
Now we have rules. I just learned that in New Jersey the law for car/booster seats is 8 years or 80 pounds. I wasn’t 80 pounds until I was freshman in high school. (almost) Seriously. I was one of those skinny kids who got a “more pounds than inches” party (with cake) when I was finally heavier than I was tall (oh, how I long for those days). I know, the law says I would have been out of the booster at age 8 (Fourth Grade). I just can’t see my fourth grade self in a booster. Most kids where I grew up were driving a grain truck in the fourth grade.
The most expensive gear we have purchased for our child is car seats. We got the infant baby bucket as a gift from my parents. We dropped about $120 (on sale, of course) for an Evenflo seat that looks like a papsan chair. We spent $170 (sale price again) for a Britax Roundabout for Andy’s rig. Britax is supposed to be THE car seat to have. It has a nice plush cover. As I look at our baby budget I realize car seats have cost us more than ALL the other baby furniture we have purchased. By a long ways. True, I am very cheap and admit I love hand-me-down stuff (crib, exersaucer, swing, basinet, pack-n-play, backpack, jogger stroller). We got some great gifts (baby bucket seat, high chair & bouncy seat). The only big things we bought new were the two carseats, the breast pump (ebay), the baby jail (you MUST have one of these), the stroller (clearance $40) & the crib mattress (I just couldn’t use the hand-me-down one that had been in the Quonset with the mice). Oh, and the $20 humidifier & FP crib aquarium that SAVED MY SANITY in those first few months.
This post started out as a serious essay (hah!) about the pros & cons of increased measures for the safety of children and turned into a laundry list of baby gear. Do you see what is wrong with my life? Focus and the ability to create a cohesive thought are not high on my “ability” list right now.
When we were a bit older, we had a baby blue, four-door, diesel Volkswagon Rabbit. It only had two seat belts in the back so dad took an old belt out of the Plymouth (it is still parked under our tree house at Grandpa’s) and installed it in the middle for my sister’s car seat. She was the dividing wall and my brother and I fought over her in the car seat all the way to Grammy’s house… it explains so much. Yes, people, that is correct. 3 children & 2 adults plus gear in a RABBIT for a NINE hour (plus construction & potty breaks) drive.
Now we have rules. I just learned that in New Jersey the law for car/booster seats is 8 years or 80 pounds. I wasn’t 80 pounds until I was freshman in high school. (almost) Seriously. I was one of those skinny kids who got a “more pounds than inches” party (with cake) when I was finally heavier than I was tall (oh, how I long for those days). I know, the law says I would have been out of the booster at age 8 (Fourth Grade). I just can’t see my fourth grade self in a booster. Most kids where I grew up were driving a grain truck in the fourth grade.
The most expensive gear we have purchased for our child is car seats. We got the infant baby bucket as a gift from my parents. We dropped about $120 (on sale, of course) for an Evenflo seat that looks like a papsan chair. We spent $170 (sale price again) for a Britax Roundabout for Andy’s rig. Britax is supposed to be THE car seat to have. It has a nice plush cover. As I look at our baby budget I realize car seats have cost us more than ALL the other baby furniture we have purchased. By a long ways. True, I am very cheap and admit I love hand-me-down stuff (crib, exersaucer, swing, basinet, pack-n-play, backpack, jogger stroller). We got some great gifts (baby bucket seat, high chair & bouncy seat). The only big things we bought new were the two carseats, the breast pump (ebay), the baby jail (you MUST have one of these), the stroller (clearance $40) & the crib mattress (I just couldn’t use the hand-me-down one that had been in the Quonset with the mice). Oh, and the $20 humidifier & FP crib aquarium that SAVED MY SANITY in those first few months.
This post started out as a serious essay (hah!) about the pros & cons of increased measures for the safety of children and turned into a laundry list of baby gear. Do you see what is wrong with my life? Focus and the ability to create a cohesive thought are not high on my “ability” list right now.
Wednesday, May 25, 2005
Monday, May 23, 2005
Friday, May 20, 2005
I’m So Sorry.
It has been pointed out to me that not every location has Fat Tire Beer.
For this, I am truly sorry.
Baby Socks.
Ever gone to work with a baby sock trapped in your clothes? Yeah, me too. But I’m here to preach the solution. Lingerie bags. Keeps the washer & dryer from eating the socks. Makes them easy to match up. ( I was going to say “mate them” but I know my readership…. I can just see my brother putting on a Barry White disc and leaving his Smart Wools with his silk ski boot liners and hoping for some baby argyles.) So go get yourself some lingerie bags. Yes. Amen.
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