Vacation 101

1. They got off the plane last.
2. Lala is wearing a sexy t-shirt and purple crocs.
3. She was packing Little (18 months) in the backpack
4. Big (She’ll be 6 in September) in a sundress & green crocs.
5. Middle (3 ½) dragging a giant pink wheeled backpack and wearing red crocs.
6. I had to buy a pair of crocs just to blend in.
7. Mine are light blue.
8. They look ridiculous and I love them.
9. They only brought one suitcase for all 4 of them.
10. We spent quite a bit of time at the lake.
11. Lala & I were the hottest moms there…. Although I stuck with the slimming black one-piece and didn’t bust out the new tankini…. Still have some love handle issues to deal with before the tags come off that one.
12. We all wore sunscreen and got tan anyway.
13. We rented a paddleboat ($5 for ½ hour) and saw some big fish…. We also saw a lot of monster snot in the water.
14. We kept the giant “beach bag” packed at all times with towels & beach toys.
15. The trusty red wheelie cooler was our best friend.
16. Sweet Boy learned how to drink out of a straw.
17. My dear husband got a taste of what polygamy might be like… the multiple wives & children part… not the sex part.
18. Dear Husband doesn’t want ANYTHING to do with polygamy.
19. Lala & I decided we would be good partners….. except the sex part.
20. She did all the laundry while she was here.
21. I scored a good enchilada recipe from her.
22. We painted the bathroom purple. Actually, silverberry.
23. We painted the dryer white.
24. We both think a good vacation involves painting something.
25. The kids were very good.
26. Her kids are good shoppers.
27. My son is a climber.
28. We went to the carousel. It is way cool. Rides are $1. One of the horses has a dead bunny strapped to the back of the saddle. We did not point this out to the girls. Other riding animals include otters, big horn sheep, bison, um, darn, I can’t remember any more.
29. Lala makes great “kid mix” for snacking.
30. I made great “grownup mix” for snacking.
31. We snacked a lot.
32. Margaritas in a bucket are a good thing.
33. We can still raise hell in Target… even with 4 kids in tow….. we are a force to be reckoned with.
34. We had healthy meals most of the time.
35. We ordered pizza once…. The first night they were here. We got our old favorite. Double mushroom, extra cheese, no sauce. Try it. You’ll like it.
36. We only ate fast food once….. tacos & pizza at the mall while we were getting Montana t-shirts, Croc sandals & a stuffed bunny.
37. We took the kids to see the helicopter at my sister’s workplace. Little said, “Oh.” And was completely spellbound by the ‘copter. I have never seen anything so adorable.
38. My son, of course, was more interested in “driving” the lawn tractor sprinkler around the yard.
39. My sister was very pleased with the picnic we brought. She really likes ham and oreos.
40. Big & Middle loved the Smokey Bear stickers & rulers.
41. Even after eating, well, everything in sight, I only gained a couple of pounds so there is hope the tankini tags will come off this summer.
42. We watched fireworks from my aunt’s deck on the 4th.
43. She has a great house on Mt Helena with a good view of the big display in East Helena and all the smaller displays in the valley.
44. People in Helena spend a lot of money on fireworks.
45. My husband won’t let us do fireworks….. that’s just part of life being married to a firefighter.
46. There isn’t much better than sitting in a comfy lawn chair with a snuggly little boy wearing batman jammies watching fireworks.
47. Especially when you add in a big glass of red wine & a slice of key lime pie.
48. Lala’s family has a language of their own.
49. We watched the Great Foo-howie of the fireworks.
50. We said, “Cwhwah-haa” for croissants.
51. We called each other Momjado. (From mom-would-you….)
52. Sometimes when I say something odd I realize it is a lalaism. Like calling a shopping cart a buggy.
53. Her kids pay a “mom tax” when they get candy or treats.
54. We watched “Nemo” and re-remembered all the great quotes from it.
55. My husband wore jeans to the lake.
56. We drank a lot of coffee with hazelnut creamer.
57. I mean a lot.
58. We went for a “nature walk” and saw baby deer twins.
59. We didn’t see any snakes.
60. Gunnar was a good dog and tolerated two little girls pulling him two different directions with two different leashes.
61. The front wheel fell off the wheelie stroller.
62. We fixed it.
63. We walked to my in-laws and decided we were tired so we called home and had the husband come and get us.
64. The girls got a good picture of the mama deer that seems to be living in the old collapsed barn.
65. We wore baseball caps, t-shirts & shorts every day.
66. We only had to do laundry once… or twice.
67. We played tourist and got Montana gear for everyone.
68. We saw the former governor in Dillard’s.
69. She talked to the kids and welcomed them to Montana.
70. She has a very cool purse made from license plates from her dad’s old truck.
71. They taught us how to “eat the orphans first” when eating grapes.
72. We taught them it is ok to pee off the porch.
73. They helped us turn Sweet Boy’s car seat around.
74. Sweet Boy loves it.
75. Little & Sweet Boy spent a lot of time “talking” to each other.
76. We have no idea what they were saying but they sure thought it was funny.
77. Sweet Boy did a “happy dance” every morning when he came down the stairs and saw them there.
78. He cried the morning after they left.
79. I almost did too.
80. Husband wasn’t nearly so sad…. I think the polygamy scared him.
81. 3 small children and a mom don’t make as much of an explosion as you might expect when they unpack.
82. We rented a minivan.
83. It had a dvd player.
84. We watched a princess movie in the driveway.
85. The minivan was a dream to drive.
86. We bought stuff for s’mores and never made them.
87. Lala couldn’t get over what great ROCKS we have here. Apparently, in other places, you pay big money for such rocks.
88. I sent her home with a few small rocks in her suitcase.
89. We didn’t go to a garden center once while they were here.
90. It took extreme control.
91. We are a menace in a garden center…. We always have been.
92. Lala and I met when she was a freshman & I was a sophomore in college.
93. We lived in a dorm called “the virgin vault.”
94. She is the wittiest and funniest person I know.
95. She also gives good advice.
96. She bought an adorable fossil purse while she was here.
97. Then she bought another one.
98. After they left my husband told me they can come back any time.
99. I miss them all terribly.
100. I want them to come back and move in next door so we can make a stepping stone path between our houses.
101. I’m going down there in October. Get ready.